Question:

Why do I feel inadequate because I have fertility problems?

Psychological Impact of Infertility

Infertility is more than just a physical condition. The inability to conceive children, or carry a child to term, has emotional impact, as well.

Common feelings associated with infertility can include:

  • Guilt
  • Depression
  • Frustration and anger
  • Feelings in inadequacy
Guilt can play a role in infertility, in that a man or woman is unable to fulfill the perceived expectations to provide their parents with grandchildren, or that they have done something, during their life, for which they are being "punished" by not being "allowed" to have children. Though these perceptions may not reflect acurately upon the infertility situation, guilt is a strong emotion, which can ovewhelm logic.

Depression is a result of grief. Each type of loss, whether emotional or physical, elicits feelings of grief. Even positive change can contribute to grief, since change represents loss. When you desire children, but are having difficulty conceiving or carrying them to term, you "lose" the opportunity to become a parent, which results in feelings of grief and depression.

Frustration and anger may also be present, with infertility. The monitoring, timing and effort that is expended in attempting to achieve conception and birth, can be stressful. Failure to conceive, when a child is so greatly desired, contributes to anger - at ones' self and perhaps at society - for not being "allowed" to have a child, when others conceive so easily.

Feelings of inadequacy are frequently present, when one is coping with infertility. During the initial stages of assessment and testing, each partner wonders whether they is something "wrong" with THEM, which is preventing conception. Men and women, alike, may feel less than whole or adequate, if they are the one with the fertility problem.

Infertility Counselors are a wonderful resource for helping to sort out feelings related to infertility and infertility treatment, and to assist in developing additional coping mechanisms to ease the feelings of guilt, depression, frustration, anger and self-inadequacy.

Infertility Frequently Asked Questions

Why would someone want to get a vasectomy?

Why did my wife get pregnant after my vasectomy?

What are the risks of getting a vasectomy?

What are the risks of reversing a vasectomy?

Are there any alternatives to vasectomy?

How much does a vasectomy and a reversal cost?

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Why do I feel like I am grieving over my infertility?

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Why do I feel inadequate because I have fertility problems?

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How do hormones impact infertility?

What is involved with surrogacy?

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What are "fertility drugs" and what do they do?

How would one go about Egg Donation?

What is In Utero Fertilization and how is it done?

What are some alternative therapies for treating infertility?

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Are there surgical options available to treat my infertility?

What exactly is a fertility clinic?

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Why does someone choose tubal ligation?

What is post tubal ligation syndrome?

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What are the risks of having a tubal and a tubal reversal?

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Why might someone get pregnant after a tubal ligation?

What is the origin of Artificial Insemination?

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What are the laws governing sperm and egg donation?

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What is "artificial insemination?"

What is the process for becoming a sperm donor?

How do I go about getting IVF insurance?

Can I use personal loans to pay for IVF?

How much does IVF cost?

How can I finance IVF?

What are third party loans in terms of financing IVF?

Will my insurance cover IVF?

What is "shared risk" in terms of IVF?

Are public funds used for IVF financing?

What is the role of Medical Counseling in fertility treatment?

How can a Financial Counselor help with fertility treatment?

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How does one go about choosing an Infertility Center?

Where can I get information and about infertility?

How do I go about finding a Fertility Specialist?

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Can I become an egg donor?

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What kinds of fertility drugs are used during IVF?

What are some of the moral and ethical dilemmas associated with IVF?





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Guru Spotlight
Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.